Monday, March 17, 2008

Slocomb Annexed By Mexico

Slocomb Annexed By Mexico

Mexican President Felipe Calderone announced the annexation of the town of Slocomb Wednesday. Slocomb Mayor Vicki Moore welcomed the annexation as a sign of coming prosperity.

Mayor Moore said “It was the best thing for our community. We have more illegal immigrant tomato pickers than citizens born and raised in our area. President Calderone was kind enough to let us keep the name Slocomb for the town, he was going to rename it El Tomate. Our only regret is that all future Tomato Queens must be of Mexican descent.”

Mexican officials said the dilapidated downtown area feels very “homey” to them. The buildings remind them of most any Mexican shantytown well south of the border. Regional Planning Director, Javier Lopez said the task of bringing the Slocomb area up to Mexican standards should not take too long. “We are almost there, we will replace trailers with pueblos” Lopez said, adding “I must get a new truck that sounds of no muffler, Gringo’s new trucks do that, you must drive a truck many years in Mexico for the same sound.”

Local resident, Bubba Jenkins felt melancholy over the annexation. Jenkins said, “I ain’t learnin to speak no Mexican, I tell you that right now, but a siesta everyday, I heard that.”

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