Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Consolidation of Dothan City Schools

Officials with the Board of Education are excited about a new rung on the social ladder resulting from the consolidation of Dothan High School and Northview High School.  I spoke with Sam Nichols and several parents.

“Blue Necks is my choice,” Superintendent Sam Nichols said in reference to the new class of student expected to attend the consolidated high school.  “Dothan has a rich history of high class citizens which stretches back, shoot, some 90 years.  We hope that by integrating the Northview blue blood students with the inner city youth of Dothan High we will finally achieve parity amongst the children.”

Some parents of Northview students are worried that the consolidation will lead to a thinning of the bloodlines.

“Suppose my darling Bethanny dates a boy with a commoners name, such as James or Tim.  Oh it breaks my heart.  I have been priming her to marry that Winston boy from Spann Farm since she was three.”  An anonymous woman said.

Several parents of Dothan High students expressed optimism toward the consolidation.

“My boy Tim says he can charge 30 bucks for a dime bag, and those Northview students will pay it.  Can you imagine 30 bucks for a little bag of Mexican dirt weed?  That’s insane.”  One unnamed parent said.

“I am hoping my daughter is in a class with that Cranston boy,” Roy Burns added.  “His father has some primo hunting land.  I mean, that’s what it’s all about, right.  I would return the favor too.  We take my truck up to Talladega twice a year, line the bed with plastic and fill it up with water.  It makes a hot tub, get it?  I run a hose from the exhaust into the hot tub and it makes bubbles.  Pretty cool huh?”

“I heard that.” This reporter added.