Wednesday, April 9, 2008

Fishing Buddies

Randy sat at the bow of his boat watching his rods intently. He had something to share with his best friend Jim, who was sitting at the stern, also fishing. Jim could tell something was on Randy’s mind as he was being suddenly very quiet.

“I’ve got to tell you something” Randy broke the silence.

“Oh my God, he is going to tell me he is gay,” Jim thought to himself, adding, “What is it?”

Randy took a deep breath and told Jim his secret, “I’m not gay or nothing, but I like watching Dancing With The Stars. I can’t help it. Roberta knows and she doesn’t think it is a big deal, but I just never had the courage to say it to you.”

“Okay”, Jim said, “You’re telling me this because…”

“I am telling you because I am angry. Last night Adam Carolla was voted off. I don’t care that Adam Carolla was voted off, but that means we will not see his dancing partner Julianne Hough, the second finest woman on the show, again this season. She is beautiful and she can move. Of course the finest woman is Edyta Sliwinska. She’s the one to watch. Her hip movement is hypnotic. Every time she dances I only watch her lower body. She is one sexy woman.”

“You’re crazy.” Jim said solemnly.

“No I am not!” Randy was excited now. “These women, the outfits they wear, the way they move. I can’t talk. I am glued to the screen.”

“You are crazy, you fool! Julianne is the best-looking babe on the show, Edyta is the sexiest. There is a big difference and if that idiot Adam Carolla wouldn’t lead with his heel and keep his shoulders up then we would still have Julianne. Aarrgh, why oh why did we have to lose Julianne?”

“You idiot, why didn’t you tell me you watch that show? Did you worry I might think you were gay?” Randy quipped.

“Maybe we are gay because I know more about ballroom dancing than I should, thanks to Carrie Ann, Lynn and Bruno. I tell you this, if watching Julianne on Dancing With The Stars is wrong, I don’t want to be right.” Jim joked, but with serious undertones.

Randy said, “I heard that.”

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